Yes, you are about to read another article by a man who has written a “How-To” that is directed at women. The difference is that this article is intended to be a reference for women and something that men should thoroughly review and soak in.
As a man, you should first ask yourself “what does ‘nurture’ mean?” As a woman, try to intellectually emotionalize the term “nurture” in relation to a man. Nurturing does not mean you are dealing with an overly sensitive man who needs to be coddled. This is a description of the way “nurturing” fits a man’s needs long term.
Let’s be honest – sometimes, he doesn’t know what he needs. Sometimes he doesn’t value what a woman’s presence does for his life. Sometimes she doesn’t know what he needs. Sometimes she doesn’t know her value and assumes he is “just another male with a generalized list of desires from a woman.”
Keep these important points in mind when nurturing a man. A man needs to understand himself and what he wants in and out of life. He can’t expect a woman to match or complement him when he is all over the place. Until he is sure of these things, she will never be the right one for him and he will never know what’s right for him. He will qualify a woman temporarily and then subconsciously put her on another trial run. She will win small battles but will always be behind in the war. “War” may be a bad term but it is a war – a battle that he is having within himself and she is trying to fight alongside him without knowing who she is fighting. This can lead to her becoming an adversary as opposed to the ally she is trying to be.
How can a man attract a like-minded woman when his thoughts, emotions, purpose, and focus are scattered? We have to get clear about those things and organize them in our heads and hearts to allow them to influence our attraction to partnerships.
This isn’t about being able to physically nurture a man with sex. Referring back to my previous comment, I want to emphasize a point – a woman that doesn’t know you, can make you feel good, man. But a woman that knows you can make you a great man. She can please you in ways that nobody can. This is nurturing. I guess I could give the “definition” right here: care for and encourage the growth and development of…
This segues into the purpose of this article, which is to provide men with a guide and women a reference on what it looks like for a man to be nurtured. This isn’t a solo opinionated position. I asked a few of my single, dating, courting, in a relationship, married, and divorced male friends for their descriptions of what it felt/feels like to be nurtured by a woman. I chose them because I trust them. I chose them because they have a clear direction. I chose them because their experiences have shaped their presence/present.
What we discovered was this: nurturing a man is standing beside him in his purpose. It is assuring him that he is on the right path and making sure he is on the right path once it’s chosen. That may sound confusing, but the key is that it’s up to the man to be direct. MEN, WE HAVE TO BE DIRECT. Nurturing is being that second leg to balance his gift, goal, and finish line. If his passion if clear, nurturing is easy. Nurturing looks like reassurance. Nurturing is the sunlight on your man’s darkest day. Nurturing is hearing “you have me” when the world takes everything from him. Nurturing is sometimes quiet, but says “I got you” by you just being there. The definition of “being there” is specific to that man you are being specific to. Here are some examples:
Terrence Foster says, “Nurturing is knowing the right things to say regardless of the moment. When upset, her not being silent because she is at a loss for words from not knowing what to say. Sometimes doing things without having to tell her, not having to think, basically knowing him and what his needs are at the time. At times, knowing him better than he does.”
Taurus Hinton says, “Nurturing is constantly encouraging growth, never allowing me to settle, or become complacent… reminds me that she follows my lead. Above all, I know that she has my back.”
Daryl from Team Towe (Husband and Wife): “She is two steps ahead of me with my needs and 9 times out of 10 has already completed them. If not she is in motion to complete them. For example, in business, if I’m overloaded with work or mentally burnt out and she notices it. She will take on some of the tasks… pull out a blanket– lay me on the couch and encourage me to relax my body, mind, and soul to recharge. She reassures me. She is always thoughtful towards my family, going the extra mile with communicating with them. Whether it is holidays, birthdays, random calls etc., she knows how important family is to me.”
Jeff Whitehorn says, “I like simplicity, she fixes my plate when she doesn’t have to because she wants me to know that she appreciates/acknowledges that I take care of her, too. She goes out of her way to leave messages on the fridge that makes a potentially rough day start off positive. I know my beginning.”
Tony Jefferson, Jr. says, “Speak life into him. Calm his heart and mind when the world is coming for him. Challenge him to be the best version of himself. Be the best version of herself because whatever they are doing, they are representing each other. Knows his love language.”
Nurturing is specific. Nurturing cultivates. Nurturing makes sure. Nurturing is what she is when you let her be. Nurturing is who you are when you are specific.
Wrap each other in love.
Be peace to each other.
Create, obtain, and sustain love.
Have the direction you are going and she will be the light to guide you.
(Image credit: rebloggy.com)